Do you listen to your partner every time you communicate? Has boredom become a concern in your relationship? Are you wondering how to be a happy couple through the years? I think everyone asks themselves these questions at some point during their relationship. Since I always like to be prepared, I decided to research how to make love last and share with you what I found.
First of all, as a writer, I believe that communication is the seed to growing a strong and healthy relationship and the tool you need to cultivate it. Often times we take communicating with each other for granted. I bet if you asked yourself how you can be a better communicator, and were honest, you would probably say by being a better listener. For one thing, by truly listening to your partner you will discover new things about them so that you'll have something interesting to talk about. Listening is a powerful skill and one that can help you succeed in your professional life as well as your personal one. Many of us seem to focus on being heard and not the other way around, for this reason listening is going to require practice.
Additionally, developing your individual interests can help deter the boredom that sometimes creeps into a relationship. Although having mutual interests are important, couples need time apart to pursue things that make them happy. Too much togetherness can harm a relationship. One of Hollywood's most romantic relationships that withstood the test of time was Paul Newman and Joanne Woodward. Admittedly when asked why their marriage lasted so long, Paul Newman is quoted on the IMDB website as saying "we are very, very different people and yet somehow we feed off those varied differences and instead of separating us, it has made the whole bond a lot stronger."
Unfortunately some couples are threatened by their partner's independence. Therefore I suggest the following advice from an article, written by Kimberly Dawn Neumann titled, "Happy Couples: What's Their Secret?"
Nurture your separate selves
Going off to your book club when your sweetie's out golfing isn't a sign you two are drifting apart. On the contrary, developing individual interests allows for a richer life as a couple. By taking little "couple breaks," you gain a greater appreciation of the gifts your partner brings to your life and you have more to offer as well. "It's very sexy to be independent sometimes," says Magdoff. "You feel better about yourself and you're less demanding of your partner when you're together." After all, taking some personal responsibility for your own well-being relieves the other person of the pressure to "provide" happiness-so go ahead and nurture some solo adventures. That'll also keep each of you stocked with plenty of adventures to chat about, which also builds your bond.
Eventually we realize that relationships are always a work in progress. We start out by creating a bond and then we need to continue to strengthen that bond to make it last. So how does a couple work together towards strengthening an already amazing relationship? I recommend the following 5 tips from an article titled, "5 Habits of Successful Couples" How to love and cherish each other through the years by: Dr. Pepper Schwartz.
- They keep up with the changes.
- They know how to fight fairly.
- They find new ways to play.
- They accept the challenges of aging.
- They stay physically connected.
Finally, I'm a firm believer in focusing on the positive. So rather than learning what not to do to maintain a successful relationship, check out the article link below and learn what to do to keep yours happy. Better yet, have your partner read it to you and just listen.
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